What anger really is: A natural emotion, not “bad”.
Anger is often a misunderstood emotion. A lot of people are told growing up that anger is a “bad” emotion, and you shouldn’t be angry, but anger isn’t a bad thing. Anger is a natural human response to feeling hurt, frustrated, betrayed, threatened, etc. It’s okay to feel angry, it’s okay to be angry. Anger is only a bad thing when you don’t know how to manage it properly and you react in unhealthy ways or turn it into violence. It can be a confusing emotion, and you may not know how to deal with it. Anger is a very complex emotion that can be caused by many different things. If you don’t know what’s causing your anger, then you won’t be able to express it in a healthy way. You must first understand why you feel angry before you can be able to deal with it, it may be caused by something someone did or said to you, maybe you can’t figure out how to do something, stressing about a deadline or a big decision, maybe it’s things you’ve pushed down and bottled up. Understanding your triggers and why you feel this way is the first step to healthily managing your anger. When you understand the cause of your anger you can then learn how to express it in a healthy way instead of suppressing it or exploding on someone.
Anger is a signal, not a flaw
Anger is not something to be ashamed about; it doesn’t make you a horrible person, it just means you’re human, and you’ve got stuff going on. You don’t need to get rid of anger completely, and even if you tried, you can’t. It’s important that you deal with your anger in a healthy way. Learn to recognize your triggers and how to react without hurting yourself or others. With awareness and tools, you can take control and respond rather than react impulsively with anger. Learning to deal with your anger takes time, effort and a lot of patience. Be kind and patient with yourself on your healing journey; it’s okay to make mistakes; you’ll get to where you want to be.